The Best Butt Balm Recipe Ever

After over a week of unrelenting Diarrhea, Charlie's little pooper was the color of a Florida sunrise. Yesterday was spent trying to keep up with the diaper blowouts every hour, as well as trying to keep his bottom dry and soothed. Needless to say, Gretchen was at wit's end, as was Charlie's bottom. To the rescue came neighbor Kristin, with the following recipe for the Best Butt Balm in the world:

• 1/2 Tube of A+D Ointment
• 1/2 Tube of Zinc Oxide (or Desitin)
• 1 T. Bacitraicin (or other antibiotic ointment)
• 1 T. Maalox or Mylanta (ya rly)
• 1 T. Betadine

Mix ingredients to combine and apply every diaper change. We didn't use the Betadine, but this stuff works! Charlie woke up this morning and his rear was MUCH better looking. We've been keeping this applied all morning and his bottom is almost right as rain. If we could just get him to stop soiling himself so often, life would be grand!